Candiesforyou

Hooots, life's gonna get so much more interesting as days go by. Today is bipolar-day as my brain goes haywired and emotion fluctuates. Day rating: 5, people who make my day, break my day so yeah, life's pretty fair. So overall it's not that bad. Been spenting too much of Vitamin M (as usual). So I went to town today, intending to watch a movie but ended up with no movies but shopping again. Gotten a pair of pumps (I LIKE IT ALOT!), a shorts and a dress from F21. Seriously turning into a F21 person. I should so totally avoid shopping malls and blogshops, anywhere which can make me broke, I should avoid. Abstinence is key. As we grow, our perception of things changes. We mature. How amusing it was to think back 10 years ago, boy-girl relationship is a "eeeeewwww or a yucks! thing", then 5 years later, it's a in thing, "wah people got bf/gf, I also want!", and now, things get pretty serious or at least for me and the girls. It's not puppylove anymo...

Today was good, rate it 6/10points cause there's many ups and there's downs. I had my last presentation and it was pretty good I feel, at least there's not much mistakes in our slides. And then was Biathlon, the event was being delayed by an hour and I thought I could make it in time for training. It ended at 8, so darn late. Well didn't know my swim timing and placing but I did pretty well! Didn't slack and gave in all my best, and my run-partner was so darn fast in the last 200m sprint! Thanks man, for the encouragement, no matter what the placing, we both did well. :) I'm apologize for being a bitch just now, it's my bad. Hopefully it will make us stronger. Thank you :) Tomorrow gonna be a good day too. And for sunday, I really don't wanna put any stress on myself anymore. There's this famous saying in my secondary school, "What you believe is what you will achieve." It's do or die on Sunday, so just treat it like a training session ...

Yesterday I'd said tomorrow will be a better day and yes indeed, today was a great day! Morning was Mr Aaron's farewell party and had an awesome time with FYP mates. Then was self-training all the way till night which was pretty awesome too. I'm "on-form" today and everything went smoothly. Hopefully I will be performing better coming Sunday, but I've learn not to put much hope as high hopes only lead to greater disappointment. I should just go and complete the events with no pressure and if I win, I win. All out for relays. Go WSapiens, let's go and have some fun! :D I'm having smalls blister wound on my toes, sepak and rope injuries again. Sigh but heck if I do well during Nationals, everything would be worth it. And tomorrow's Pol-ite Biathlon, also praying hard that I would not come in last, not intending to get any placing but not last, that's good enough for me. I should stop munching on nonsense cause after all I've been through to ...

I'm done with the slides for the last presentation of my school life in poly. And I'm left with 8 official school days and I'm done with school. So gonna miss everyone so much. It's a pity that everyone only got bonded in year 3 but nevertheless it's good. Despite the conflicts we faced, we should remain as friends in the future, it's fate that brought us together as a class, we should honour it. :) I should quit whining about being stressed up by competition, school and what so ever cause I made choices and I have to live with it. Sorry for being such a bitch. Pms-ing now too, today I've experienced one of my worst mood swings throughout the day, can be smiling and laughing and the next moment, staring and glaring at people feeling fked up. Monthly affairs, cannot help it. And did I mention that I'm quite in love with balloons and I've been secretly hoping for something. I'm finally acting like a girl for once. :) Okayz so now I'm dead tired...

On and on people around you make an impact in your life, some did just earlier on today. I was totally disappointed with myself cause I could not exercise self-discipline and let people down. They trusted me and I broke my own promises, such a let down. I couldn't get pass my own conscience. I'm gonna be nineteen soon, I should be mature and responsible enough, for this is the path that I chose, this is what I love isn't it. Why is this happening, urghhh. Tension is building up inside me, it's a week away and I do not expect much from myself cause I've really been slacking much ever since June. I'm such a waste, I'm such a let down. Fuck seriously why am I doing all these nonsense to make me feel so fucking disappointed with myself. Fml seriously. Don't tell me it's okay cause it's definitely not, wait till sunday. I'm pretty sure I will have an emotional breakdown, it's a standard routine during compeition for me to cry. Cause I care why...

Everything happens for a reason, everything happens for a reason. So whatever is going on with my life now I should just accept it. Anyway I'm really happy now and I shouldn't feel vexed now. On contary I feel relieved that things are going smoothly now and not the other way round. July really a good month for me, at least till now. I should just go with the flow and stop creating unnecessary problems for myself. Cause I will be happy and everyone else will be too. That's enough. Fyp event yesterday was superb and despite me putting in so little effort (my booth is relatively easy to handle), I've gotten an A, well everyone else did. So yippeee yooooo another reason to be happy. Ohh training was great, despite not swimming for a week I still have the water feel but now my biceps are aching like mad, did some events and I can only conclude that I need to train super hard. It's only one more week till the big day. Now I pray for a better August. :) Ohhhh I have six ev...